LIFE OF A CASTAWAY

- Still Holding On

(Source: kelvinmartian)




You won’t silence me none, and what you won’t do is talk shit about my people and what I stand for !!

(Source: kelvinmartian)




Imagine If You Were Homeless…

This isn’t really the first time I’ve been homeless. There was a time once before. I really believe that he should have handled that better than the way he did. My friends were saying that he was already bothered much by me and was just looking for an excuse to put me out. The other was saying that there is something more to it, as in him liking me although the guy was saying differently. 

The agreement that was established upon the offer to stay with him was to live there rent free and just pay half the power and half the gas. I agreed to that upon move in, but once I was in things were shifted. He was saying that he didn’t want any money from me for anything, so I was like umm okay. 

Yet he was always nagging about the power bill because of my video game playing and then about the gas saying that keep my showers to a 15 minute max. In my head I’m just like…..
I didn’t mind giving any money to help pay half power or the gas, but I guess he was just caught up and full of himself saying that he can handle his own and don’t need anything from anyone. Though he explained about his times when he was once living with others and things and his mishaps that made him feel bad and less of a person, he puts me out over Comcast issue. When I explained to him that I didn’t know they were going to be touching your things, He replied back in a rude tone “WELL WHEN YOU GO LIVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE, YOU KNOW NOW !!”

I don’t understand how you can say you care about someone and want help assist them to get better in life and you do things to belittle them; as well as hold things over their heads.

My mom was asking how did I meet this person? Who are they to you? And now that I think about it, I have no idea. We met from my previous job he use to come in from time to time to get lunch and leave. So what I’ve summed it up to be now is that he is an individual who thinks he is perfect, doesn’t make mistakes and just knows everything. 

At the end of the day with so little of that time, he didn’t help me accomplish anything at all…


(Source: )




kelvinmartian:

I actually made my docs appointment this morning. Sometimes there are more tubes that need to be taken, but I only had to do 4 today. This is what I have to go through every 4-6 months. I pretty much say I’m treated like a “Lab Rat” in which I am being experimented on, BUT this is very IMPORTANT! Every doctors appointment that is scheduled it is a MUST that you go! You have to keep up on them, and do as you are instructed. I am not on medication because my numbers are good numbers and I still to this day remain “Undetectable”. This means that there was so little HIV in one sample of blood that the test could not find any, so it’s kind of like you have it, but you don’t. This is just the blood work that was done for me today. I have another appointment that was scheduled to get my results for this one read to me. I expect nothing other than good news on that.

I wanted to give you all some insight on how things are going for me and what goes on while being HIV+. I hope all of who I am and what I do is an example and inspiration to you all.




kelvinmartian:

Being HIV+ is not a death sentence, BUT it is mainly up to the person what they do and how they live their life as to what the outcome will be




kelvinmartian:

Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

I do grow tired of having multiple sex partners and want a genuine relationship. I’ve experienced a lot of things within growing up and learning and with this lifestyle. 

There are many reasons why I am not wanted as a Boyfriend, and it saddens me quite often. So I question myself “Who could ever love someone like me?” 

-Multiple sex partners (Promiscuity)

-Ex Webcam Model (Solo Porn)

-Nude photos on the Internet

-Cocktail Server for Strip Club (Walking around half naked & Men touching my body and parts)

-Once upon a time had “Sugar Daddies” 

-Lack of conversation at times

-Financial Issues

-Being HIV +

-Being “Younger” (Fact being I’ve always been attracted to older men or at least men my age)

-Materialistic things

-Im not “Masculine” enough

-I don’t sound like a “MAN”

-My Life Story

-Etc. (The list could go on forever)

I also would like people to understand that everyone is not going to be a match with every person that they encounter. It’s not going to work that way no matter how bad you want it to. Mutuality is what you must look for as well as a lot of other things. If it’s not meant for you and I to be together, then it shall not be. If it is not the time, then it shall not be. Rushing things will only set you up for stress and other unwanted issues and frustrations. 

Everyone person must know that you CANNOT get MAD at someone just because they are happy in pursuing and or in a relationship with another person. If you truly love, care, and have the respect for that person, Then you would be nothing but happy for them. It is so immature, selfish, fake, and rude to stop talking or being cordial with that person. 

Always remember : WHERE THERE IS NO TRUST, THERE IS NOTHING ! - Trust goes a long way…

When I establish Im for you, Then I am for you . Whatever decisions you make, I will always be there for you . If I am not the one for you, then I will be happy for you, For you have found another . Won’t ever catch me being fake in any way, shape, or form. That is not in my nature, I’m much more mature than that .

- Once again, I feel like I may have missed some spots in this video. But I record directly from the camera built into my laptop. If you all have any questions or may be confused about anything I’ve said in this video, feel free to contact me and let me know so I can better clear it up.

CORRECTION !!! - HIV testing… it doesnt take 6-12 months … really it only takes 25 days for you body to create and antibody, the orignal speculation that it took 6 months for an hiv exposure to pro show a positive diagnosis was based on not knowin the exact time at whicha person would have been in exposed… so rule of thumb … it take 3 weeks to 3months for your body to produce the anitbody that they ORA QUICK test is looking for 

Thank you all for your time - xoxo 




kelvinmartian:

Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

I do grow tired of having multiple sex partners and want a genuine relationship. I’ve experienced a lot of things within growing up and learning and with this lifestyle. 

There are many reasons why I am not wanted as a Boyfriend, and it saddens me quite often. So I question myself “Who could ever love someone like me?” 

-Multiple sex partners (Promiscuity)

-Ex Webcam Model (Solo Porn)

-Nude photos on the Internet

-Cocktail Server for Strip Club (Walking around half naked & Men touching my body and parts)

-Once upon a time had “Sugar Daddies” 

-Lack of conversation at times

-Financial Issues

-Being HIV +

-Being “Younger” (Fact being I’ve always been attracted to older men or at least men my age)

-Materialistic things

-Im not “Masculine” enough

-I don’t sound like a “MAN”

-My Life Story

-Etc. (The list could go on forever)

I also would like people to understand that everyone is not going to be a match with every person that they encounter. It’s not going to work that way no matter how bad you want it to. Mutuality is what you must look for as well as a lot of other things. If it’s not meant for you and I to be together, then it shall not be. If it is not the time, then it shall not be. Rushing things will only set you up for stress and other unwanted issues and frustrations. 

Everyone person must know that you CANNOT get MAD at someone just because they are happy in pursuing and or in a relationship with another person. If you truly love, care, and have the respect for that person, Then you would be nothing but happy for them. It is so immature, selfish, fake, and rude to stop talking or being cordial with that person. 

Always remember : WHERE THERE IS NO TRUST, THERE IS NOTHING ! - Trust goes a long way…

When I establish Im for you, Then I am for you . Whatever decisions you make, I will always be there for you . If I am not the one for you, then I will be happy for you, For you have found another . Won’t ever catch me being fake in any way, shape, or form. That is not in my nature, I’m much more mature than that .

- Once again, I feel like I may have missed some spots in this video. But I record directly from the camera built into my laptop. If you all have any questions or may be confused about anything I’ve said in this video, feel free to contact me and let me know so I can better clear it up.

CORRECTION !!! - HIV testing… it doesnt take 6-12 months … really it only takes 25 days for you body to create and antibody, the orignal speculation that it took 6 months for an hiv exposure to pro show a positive diagnosis was based on not knowin the exact time at whicha person would have been in exposed… so rule of thumb … it take 3 weeks to 3months for your body to produce the anitbody that they ORA QUICK test is looking for 

Thank you all for your time - xoxo 




Many of us drown in flaws and I’ve never really felt like a winner….




kelvinmartian:

I do grow tired of having multiple sex partners and want a genuine relationship. I’ve experienced a lot of things within growing up and learning and with this lifestyle. 

There are many reasons why I am not wanted as a Boyfriend, and it saddens me quite often. So I question myself “Who could ever love someone like me?” 

-Multiple sex partners (Promiscuity)

-Ex Webcam Model (Solo Porn)

-Nude photos on the Internet

-Cocktail Server for Strip Club (Walking around half naked & Men touching my body and parts)

-Once upon a time had “Sugar Daddies” 

-Lack of conversation at times

-Financial Issues

-Being HIV +

-Being “Younger” (Fact being I’ve always been attracted to older men or at least men my age)

-Materialistic things

-Im not “Masculine” enough

-I don’t sound like a “MAN”

-My Life Story

-Etc. (The list could go on forever)

I also would like people to understand that everyone is not going to be a match with every person that they encounter. It’s not going to work that way no matter how bad you want it to. Mutuality is what you must look for as well as a lot of other things. If it’s not meant for you and I to be together, then it shall not be. If it is not the time, then it shall not be. Rushing things will only set you up for stress and other unwanted issues and frustrations. 

Everyone person must know that you CANNOT get MAD at someone just because they are happy in pursuing and or in a relationship with another person. If you truly love, care, and have the respect for that person, Then you would be nothing but happy for them. It is so immature, selfish, fake, and rude to stop talking or being cordial with that person. 

Always remember : WHERE THERE IS NO TRUST, THERE IS NOTHING ! - Trust goes a long way…

When I establish Im for you, Then I am for you . Whatever decisions you make, I will always be there for you . If I am not the one for you, then I will be happy for you, For you have found another . Won’t ever catch me being fake in any way, shape, or form. That is not in my nature, I’m much more mature than that .

- Once again, I feel like I may have missed some spots in this video. But I record directly from the camera built into my laptop. If you all have any questions or may be confused about anything I’ve said in this video, feel free to contact me and let me know so I can better clear it up.

CORRECTION !!! - HIV testing… it doesnt take 6-12 months … really it only takes 25 days for you body to create and antibody, the orignal speculation that it took 6 months for an hiv exposure to pro show a positive diagnosis was based on not knowin the exact time at whicha person would have been in exposed… so rule of thumb … it take 3 weeks to 3months for your body to produce the anitbody that they ORA QUICK test is looking for 

Thank you all for your time - xoxo